Living in a state where you are not constantly trying mentally.
Not trying to fit, not trying to act, not trying to smile.
Just breathing and relaxing and walking normally.
Not trying. Not conscious every second of the day.
That kind of relaxation.
The kind where you can curl up in a ball in your closet and drink tea and close your eyes.
And when it washes over you, you feel like you could stay that way for hours. But then knowing you can’t. And being okay with that.
You only need a few hours.
You only have a few hours, anyway.
Away from all the trying, away from all the confusion and worry and fear.
And just alone in your closet.
Moments like these are moments worth living for.